From the time we were little my mom taught us to not say "hate." She said that hate is a very strong word and she didn't like us using it. Instead we should say "don't care for." So, I never cared for fruit. Garvey never cared for vegetables. And there were plenty of times we really didn't care for each other.
I think my mom's rule was a good one. I don't allow my students to say hate. We say "don't like." But in my relationship with Asia, I say, "strongly dislike."
Thailand is wonderful. I know that it will never rain because it isn't the rainy season. I know that there will always be fresh fruit stands littering the streets on the way home from the fitness center (I have to be careful not to say gym... it is an inappropriate word for a girl's private parts and I have already received too many strange looks by making that mistake!). I know that 4 out of 5 days a week my students will bring me food in the morning. I know that the night market will always be filled with endless options of delicious food and knock offs. But Thailand is part of Asia, and therefore, has many Asian tendencies. This is where dislike comes in.
There are always hundreds of people everywhere I go. There are people bumping into me at the night market, grocery store, movie theater, the new plaza, and the hallways of school. There are nights when I want to eat McDonald's, simply because I can't deal with the Asian-ness of the markets.
I am told that I look "very sexy" anytime my shoulders are showing. Come on! It's 105 degrees out there, can't I wear a tank top?!
The Thai teachers and assistants are constantly poking and prodding me telling me I look slender or very big, depending on the day.
I am always being guided. Anytime I walk with someone, they grab my elbow and waist, and lead me. How annoying.
I am always being fed. Even when I'm not hungry! Teachers leave me sticky rice, students give me cookies. It's always something. And it is rude to say no. So of course I am looking very big!
And then there is the staring. I'm white. Very white. And people stare. Constantly. Traffic literally stops as I drive by. Koreana likes that part of it. She says "people are so busy staring that they forget to drive and cut us off! This is great! We are never going to get into an accident." But not only am I white, I happen to have lots and lots of freckles. And with the intense sun, my freckles multiply. My students now call me polka dotted.
The crowds can be frustrating and the guiding is annoying, but it is Thailand. This is just life here. And at the end of the day, I really do love it. I just prefer the days that are less "Asian."
How nice there aren't ANY people in this picture. Where was it taken?
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P.S. I don't know who Madeleine is, but for some reason her name shows up on my comment.
Mom-
ReplyDeleteThat is just plain bizarre. Poor Madeleine who is writing comments on a random blog she has never read!
The picture was taken at the lake near my apartment. Koreana and I usually go for a walk around it every Sunday night at sunset. Don't worry, you will get the same exact view very soon!
You obviously have a very high coping mechanism. It does, and will continue, to serve you well.
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